" glad hands "

 [ "glad hands" ]

1: Used to describe a handshake from a person who has malicious intentions, in regards to your future.

  * e.g.,  ... Fuck smiley glad hands 

 [ "Glad-Handing" ]

1: To offer masturbatory assistance. Used in leu of the term reach-around.

  * e.g.,  ... i.e. After glad-handing my boss I got a massive pay raise. 

 [ "Glad handed" ]

1: Glad handed is when you play a game of basketball and someone grabs your buns when you're down low.

  * e.g.,  ... I was in the lane and Buddy threw me the ball, next thing I know, someone glad handed me. 

 [ "Glad Hand" ]

1: ONE in the pink; FOUR in the stink... which after insertion is followed by a "Hi how are you, nice to meet you" up and down handshake type motion. When the hand is removed it seems to have a new dark brown, GLAD trash bag appearance.

  * e.g.,  ... " I met her at the airport on a layover; we drank at the bar and I gave her the old Glad Hand in a corner near Terminal C" 

 [ "Mr. Glad-Hand" ]

1: Somone like a politician who goes goes up and shakes everyone's hand with a great big smile. Feighned "Glad to meet ya."

  * e.g.,  ... Look at that jerk-off Mr. Glad-Hand cheeze-balling the crowd.